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Speaking your own truth
As I start to increase my training in preparation for the Virtual London Marathon in October it’s becoming increasing clear that my 15-year marathon running gap has caught up with me.
This hasn’t put me off, quite the opposite it’s spurring me on to regain my lost fitness, and a bit of my younger self!
If I’m completely honest I am aware that I’m fat & I have been for some time, but I’ve avoided that word, rather “I haven’t been as fit as I was” or “I’ve gained some weight during the intervening sedentary years”, my favourite being, “well I am getting older”.
I’ve mainly skirted around the edges to avoid the unpleasant truth, but this doesn’t mean that I’m written off & it doesn’t stop me from getting back to my marathon level of fitness.
It will be harder to achieve because of my decline into couch potato (ness) but not impossible.
Recognising my decline & committing to making a change wasn’t an easy process because I’ve never given up running.
I don’t run as far or as fast, but I’ve always maintained some level of fitness, just not enough to maintain a healthy body or to stop the lampposts from creaking under the weight of my rest breaks!I’m now facing up to my weight & recognising that I’m fat is the first part of my journey to lose weight & regain my fitness.
Fat isn’t a word that we like to use. It has over the years come to display the negative connotations that we relate to insult rather than fact, but by skirting around my considerable edges I have avoided facing my own truth.
Although I enjoy the feelings gained from exercise, I am increasingly recognising the imperative to returning to a healthy weight which in turn will provide me with more energy & hopefully many more years to do stuff that requires breathing & this journey has to start with an honest recognition of my starting point – being fat.
The truth means something different to each of us & for me squinting when I looked in the mirror & changes to my stance when checking my paunch became second nature, to the point that I didn’t notice I was doing it.
This isn’t a comfortable realisation but it’s a necessary one if I’m going to lose weight & regain the energy I’ve previously enjoyed.
We can often find ourselves diluting the truth in a misguided attempt to protect others & those white lies we tell ourselves get easier to accept as a new truth but speaking truthfully shouldn’t be as painful as it appears for the receiver.
Speaking our own truth will help us recognise the improvements we need to make & strengthen our resolve to achieve them.
So, if you catch me with a cream cake please feel free to call me out, although preferably once I’ve finished it!
I hope you have a great week.